By: Katelyn Tijerina
As the plane listed forwards, I closed the window to block out the sight of our violent descent. Without thinking I grab Ben’s hand, which has always fit perfectly around mine. Somehow always reminding me of the yin and yang symbol. I buckled my seatbelt and leaned forward in the proper position. Even now as I look around, people are praying and crying, and I don’t know what to do, the feeling of the plane’s descent making me nauseous. But as I’m waiting to die in a fiery crash I think about Ben. me and ben playing on the playground, me and Ben making fun of the people in horror movies, me and Ben, me and Ben.
Whoever’s listening, I would prefer to survive this with all my limbs intact.
BOOM!
As we impact the sound of grating metal on asphalt pierces my ears. As this is happening, I faintly notice Ben loosening his grip and shifting. As we drag along the ground I feel the plane’s speed decrease.
As the plane drags itself to a stop, I sit up from my position; as the blood rushes from my head, I glance over at Ben. The breath in my lungs pushed itself out in one quick, painful exhale, a lump forms in my throat. I wanted to look away, but something kept me. The mutilated body sitting next to me didn’t even look like Ben. His blonde hair looked like you pressed pause as the wind was blowing. Blood trickled out from his nose, and his eyes, empty, glassy stared into the distance, mouth hung open. The worst, though, was when my eyes moved away from his face to his body itself. His neck was bent at an odd angle and covered in red marks. His torso was contorted in on itself from his place in between the seat and the floor. I could only stare in shocked silence at the paramedics entered the plane, one of them grabbing my arm. I never got to tell him how I felt but next time would be different
“Reverse” I spoke
I opened my eyes and immediately closed them again when white light clouded my vision and caused a headache. I opened my eyes I was in my room, and the source of the light was my overhead lamp. Faintly, I could hear my phone going off. I went online, canceling the plane tickets for later today. As I got out of bed, I opened my phone to text the group.
Flight got canceled, I lied. How ‘bout a road trip?
As I waited for them to respond, I thought back to when this…ability of mine first started. The first time I had turned back time.
It was a normal day in Mrs. Miller’s fifth-grade class, except for one thing. I was in trouble. I was not a good kid. But this time I was being blamed for something I didn’t do. at the end of the day, I was almost in tears, my mom and I walked into the house. As soon as the door shut, I was darting to my room, slamming my door shut.
My room wasn’t anything fancy, I had a twin bed shoved into the corner, a blanket haphazardly tossed over it. Next to my bed was a baby blue nightstand, an alarm clock resting on top. The alarm clock was cool, one of the ones who not only read the time but also the date. Tears began to fall from my eyes as thoughts about the day came back to me. I just wish it had never happened, that I had a do-over. I looked up from my hands, and the tears immediately stopped when I noticed something odd. My eyes snapped to the date on the clock. It was wrong. Today was the 27th. Yet, the clock read May 26th.
As I went through my day, I began to realize that this wasn’t a dream. Things that had happened yesterday—no, today…I don’t know. But whatever had happened…that day…were happening again today.
Focusing back on today I got up from my bed, went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. I had a boxy face and a flat nose. My hair was not very abundant, close to my head in tight curls. My golden eyes stared back at me. To me, they always looked like a dragon’s but today they looked weakened by some imaginary force.
Eventually, after quite a debate about driving or booking new flights, I convinced my friends that a road trip would be a better idea. It was the summer before college, and probably the last time all friends would be together in the same place. We headed to the coast. It was about a thirteen-hour drive to the beach, and I was driving. I needed to be alert. When you mess with time, time messes back, and there have always been repercussions for my abilities.
I grabbed everything I’d packed for the plane trip, loading it into the bright salmon van my mom passed down to me that I’d never gotten around to repainting. I nicknamed her the Pink Panther. I smiled at the thought as I shifted into first and began the drive to pick up my friends.
The first house I arrived at was my best friend Ben’s house, with whom I grew up. He has short, wavy, dirty blonde hair and tanned skin that somehow comes naturally to him. He had a strong jawline and his blue eyes contrasted his skin making them pop even more. As I got to his door, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed his number.
“Coming.”
Ben came out five minutes later, in shorts. Only shorts.
“Umm,” I said staring at his bare chest unable to look away as he looked down.
“Shoot.” He dropped his stuff and scurried back inside. I couldn’t get the plane scene out of my head knowing that at any point he could not be here anymore. I promised myself that I’d tell him the truth at the beach. A few seconds later he came out, running towards the car. He threw his stuff inside and hopped into the passenger’s seat.
“How could you forget your shirt?” I asked quizzically.
“I don’t know,” he muttered.
The next stop was Anna’s house. She lost her hearing after a bad fall. She could hear with hearing aids, and can loosely make out words by lip-reading, but her main source of communication is American Sign Language (ASL), or writing. We roll up to her purple-tinted house, and I reach for my phone to shoot her a text. Ben then reached over and honked the horn.
“Dude! You’re such an idiot!”
“What! What did I do?” Ben asked, looking confused.
“She’s deaf!”
“Oh. Yeah.”
As soon as my text was delivered, Anna was piling her bags in the trunk and hopping into the back. I turned around, her chocolate brown hair fell at her shoulders and her bright pink top made me cringe. She loved bright colors, to the detriment of my eyes. I knew some signs, and the whole group had made an effort after her accident. I turned around, shifting my hands to form words.
‘Hi.’
‘Sup. Where Gabbie?’
The grammar used by ASL speakers is different from ours, making her sentences a little difficult to sometimes understand, but we got by.
‘We go Gabbie home.’
At the next stop, Gabbie came out as soon as we arrived, probably staring between the curtains, worrying when we were going to get there. Gabbie is beautiful. She has darker skin, which she inherited from her mother, and long black wavy hair which she never brushes, yet still looks great.
“Hello.” She spoke loud enough that Anna could hear her with the combination of her hearing aids and app on her phone that translates our words. Even though Gabriella knows more ASL than the rest of us—including Anna—due to her father’s inherited deafness, she is also the one who speaks to Anna the most.
“Everyone ready for an adventure?” As I speak Gabbie is translating what I’m saying for Anna. Anna signs back quickly, and Gabbie looks away snickering.
“Anna says it’s a quest, not an adventure. An adventure is a trip without a destination, while a quest is traveling to get somewhere to accomplish something,” Gabbie says.
“Okay then. Ready for a quest?” I say the word in a fancy British accent and everyone chuckles. Anna gave a proud nod.
Things are going well so far. We’ve been on the road for 5 hours, and I’m starting to get tense. Ben’s in control of the AUX and is currently blasting trash out of my baby’s speakers, but I’m too worried to change it. I know if I make even the smallest mistake, then it’s over. I focus on the road and the speedometer periodically, doing everything I can to ensure our safety. I heard crackling in the back, but I didn’t dare turn around. Plus, I already knew what it was. Anna had brought snacks—for her, not us—and she’s munching away while reading. Gabbie’s lost in her own actually good music, and Ben is singing at the top of his lungs. I continued to think and was lost in thought when I felt someone’s eyes on me. Ben had stopped singing and was staring at me with his brow knit.
“What?”
“You look tense, Miles.” Of course, he’d notice. He always notices when something’s wrong.
“I’m fine, just—”
“Miles look out!”
I heard the truck before I saw it and instinctively swerved into the other lane to avoid it. I jerked the wheel back in the other direction, pressing on the brakes lightly so we didn’t spin out, almost hitting another car. We barely missed the giant truck going at least twenty over the speed limit, and it screeched as its mirror grazed the side of my car, audibly leaving a scratch. My heartbeat drowned out anything else, it was all I could hear as I pulled the car off the highway. I sat, gasping heavily as my friends looked at each other with wide eyes.
“…any…hurt?”
As my heartbeat slowed, I started to hear Ben’s voice.
Is he talking to me?
I nodded, just in case he was. Obviously, this was the right thing to do because his concerned gaze then swept to the back.
“Gab? You alright?” Her wide brown eyes were staring straight ahead, hand over her heart. I unbuckle my seatbelt and turn around, moving to put my hand on her arm. As I moved, I faintly noticed my hand was shaking.
“You’re okay,” I whispered as tears began to roll down her cheeks.
I knew something was going to happen. I just wasn’t expecting that.
I got out of the car, walking back around to her door, ignoring the deep scratch on the side of the car. She’s huddled in the same position and doesn’t move as I unbuckle her seatbelt and help her up. She moves when I wrap my arms around her to reciprocate the hug.
”Ben,” I say looking into the car through the opened door, “you good?”
“Yeah. I think I’m good.”
I look up to scan our surroundings, seeing a large red sign near the place we had stopped.
“Anyone hungry?”
As we walked into the Denny’s and took our seats, I gave a cursory glance over my friends, my eyes lingering on Ben. I noticed he was trembling faintly, a little more shaken by the accident than I thought. I put my hand over his, which had been tapping insistently on the table. He glanced up at me with surprise in his eyes before it faded into gratitude, and he looked back down.
My thoughts drifted to the car, which we had slowly pulled into the restaurant parking lot. The right side was decimated, but for some reason, that didn’t bother me as much as it should. After we had ordered and finished our meal, we all got up to leave, but Gabbie stopped, hesitating at the door. Everyone was reluctant to get back into the car after what had happened, but she even more so. An idea struck.
“Let’s stop at a hotel. I think I saw a sign for a decent one a few miles back, so we should be close.”
Her shoulders sagged in relief, and we walked out of the restaurant, heading back towards the Pink Panther.
That night we stayed at a hotel that we, after some research, found out had only three stars on Yelp. It wasn’t terrible, definitely better than driving all night, but it still had a suspicious stain or two. We had two queen beds, which we decided to split between the girls and boys. Once we were settled, we switched on the TV. I think the adrenaline was still too high for us to actually fall asleep, so we stayed up until about three in the morning watching terrible comedies. Plus, it helped take our minds off things.
Later that night, I’m snapped awake by a faint tapping. I sit up on the bed, looking over to see Ben still passed out next to me.
Tap. Tap. Scratch. Tap
“What in the world,” I whispered under my breath. I had this weird feeling I couldn’t shake.
What if this was karma’s way of getting back at us? But I pushed this thought to the back of my head
I got up, moving closer to the small wall that was blocking my view from the opposite corner. I tensed up, and I could feel my heart begin to beat faster. As I turned the corner, I jumped half a meter back when I saw Anna sitting on the floor, writing in her notebook loudly.
I swallowed my girly scream and cleared my throat loudly. Anna didn’t look up, continuing to write idly.
Its night so she must not be wearing her hearing aids.
I waved my hand in front of her face, startling her.
‘How you know me here?’
‘Sound,’ I signed back quickly.
She made a short sound of affirment, I looked at her quizzically before plopping down next to her.
‘What you write?’
‘Book.’
‘Really? I see?’ She nodded and handed me the notebook.
I flip to the first page and begin reading.
“I live in a world of silence,
though I still hear their laughs.
I live without sound,
but I listen to their cries.”
“Wow,” I said amazed.
I never knew how she felt. I looked at her, seeing her blue eyes glow in the faint light. She looked perplexed, probably wondering what I was thinking.
‘write beautiful.’
‘Thank you.’
‘You sleep?’ I ask.
‘Not really.’
‘Why?’
‘Bad feelings,’ she confessed.
I pushed myself up, dropping my hand in front of her face. She took the offered hand, and I hauled her up, leading her towards Gabbie, who was peacefully sleeping.
‘I guard, you sleep.’ She nodded and laid back in bed.
I decided to pass the time by playing Mario Kart on my phone until the morning.
My feet pounded against the forest floor as I ran, not daring to look back at what was chasing me. The ground is moist, the leaves sticking to my feet. The air is humid, and I’m hot. I’m running without my shirt, but I’m still sweating profusely. In front of me, I can see my friends cheering me on, and I run faster, now encouraged. I blow past the edge of the forest and skid to a stop, turning around smiling towards my friends. My happiness fades to dread when I see my friends strewn across the sand. I see Ben, laying on his side, blood pooling under him. Not again! I run over, sinking to my knees next to him. I jerk back in shock as I feel his hand grasp my wrist.
“Help me, please Miles. I love you. Help me, Miles-”
“Miles, Miles, wake up.” I felt someone shaking me.
I blinked, peeling my eyes open, then immediately shut them again as I’m blinded by the light.
“What?” I groan, sitting up slowly letting my eyes adjust to the light. My eyesight cleared up and I saw Ben, a look of concern painted his eyes, his hand firmly gripped on my shoulder the other rested on my leg covered by the sheets. I felt sweaty and gross and a little embarrassed he was touching me.
“What…what did I miss?” My eyes danced around, confused
“Dude, you’re crying.”
“What do you—” I reached up and touched my face. My cheeks felt hot and were indeed wet. I quickly wiped my face, pushing Ben’s hands off my shoulders, causing a shiver to go down my spine from the withdrawal of heat.
“You okay?” I ignored Ben, looking around the girls were still asleep. I went over to my backpack and picked up my clothes.
“I’m gonna take a shower” I barked
We’re back on the ride I’m tenser than ever, and I think the others can feel it. Instead of singing at the top of his lungs, Ben’s on his phone scrolling through Instagram, Anna’s braiding her hair, and Gabriella is covered in a blanket staring out the window like a movie character. The car is soundless to the point I wonder if this is what Anna hears. I turn on the radio to fight the silence.
“Another one bites the dust.” skip. “Die young bury me in.” skip “We’re sayin’ RIP to every.” I turned the radio down at least Anna didn’t have to hear that. three hours driving in and I notice we’re about out of gas, so I get off the highway and pull into the closest gas station. With the car full, we decide to grab some snacks for the trip. Parked we get out. I’m paying so each person is allowed a drink and a snack. I go for a Red Bull and Snickers, Ben gets Nesquick and a Kind Bar. The girls are still looking around so we linger near the ice cream. I hear someone come in but don’t think anything of it until I hear someone in a gruff loud voice
“Give me the money or I won’t hesitate to shoot any of you square in the forehead” I go down fast pushing ben down with me. I look over and see Gabbie go down yanking anna down with her.
Only able to translate Quiet anna obeys even though she’s visibly confused
I look in front of me a big burly man with 2 or 3 jackets on has a gun in the face of the store clerk I hear sniffling and look over Gabriella’s crying. I feel responsible and it’s terrible. The cashier quickly complied with his commands. The guy looks over at us and the girls
“any of you do anymore then breath your family will by writing your eulogies”
. At this point, I’m not even breathing, my worst concern was anna she doesn’t know she’s not supposed to move she can barely hear the guy, actually, I’m not sure what Anna could hear. When the gruff man left we stayed still for another minute or two I’m not sure. When we felt we were safe I looked surprised at the cashier
“Arnt you gonna you know… call the police?” I stammered
“This happens too much and I don’t get paid enough it’s fine” I looked at him in awe
“This has happened before… And from what you’re saying consistently”
He shrugged “we weren’t in any harm”
“He just robbed you what do you mean we weren’t in any harm?”
“Did you look at his gun its Nerf his name’s Bill he’s just a homeless dude who thinks he could hurt someone with that thing, chill”
“I just.. We’ll take our things and leave” I grabbed Ben’s stuff and put it on the counter and anna and Gabbie were still on the floor.
“Go wait in the car” I instructed. I handed them the keys as they gave me their snacks. I noticed Anna hadn’t picked out a snack so I grabbed a donut. I purchased the items and got back in the car. I was starting to think my original instincts of not coming were so very correct. It would be an understatement to say we shaken up, at this point we were downright terrified and worst of all it was my fault. I put my friends in harm’s way knowing what would happen, but to this extent?
Gabbie was curled up in Annas’ arms Ben was leaned over with his head on the dashboard. I got in the car and distributed the food. I sat staring ahead, my food in my lap.
“We’re about halfway there we could turn around or keep going, either way, danger will follow”
“How do you know,” Gabriella said tears streaming down her face
“I just know okay would you like to turn back or keep going?” I answered sternly warning them not to ask
We go anna signed. This surprised me as she was holding a crippled Gabbie. The sight made me sick with guilt.
“Ben,” I asked looking at him, his knees to his chest and his blue eyes perturbed.
“Let’s find a place and sleep on it” I nodded and drove to the nearest inn.
That night Gabbie was pacing the room, I would fall asleep to the patter of her footsteps wake up and she would still be pacing and I didn’t know what to do about it. In the end, I knew nothing I could say would calm her anxiety-ridden mind. I put my hand on her shoulder she jumped and elbowed me in the stomach I doubled over.
“Oh my god are you okay”
I squeaked out an “I’m okay” I gathered myself together trying to hide that fact I peed myself a little.
“You need some sleep”
“I know,” she remarked
“Well apparently you don’t because you’re up and literally performed a John Cena move” she giggled
“Fine I’ll try to go to sleep’ I knew she wouldn’t have much luck but 30 minutes is better than no sleep and she could always sleep in the car.
I woke up that morning and was up before everybody else it was about 8 am and Gabbie wasn’t to be seen I assumed she went to the coffee shop across the street so I went to go see her. I got on my jacket, put my wallet in my pocket and headed across the street. When I get there she wasn’t insight hmm maybe she’s in the bathroom I figured she wouldn’t have gone far. So I grabbed a coffee and sat down the coffee shop was bustling people in and out. The sweet aroma of coffee and pastries surrounded me this was the first time on the trip I felt calm. I drank my coffee and scrolled through the news on my phone for a little over an hour when Anna texted.
Where are you and why you take the car confused I texted back
I’m across the street at the coffee shop and I didn’t take the car
Then who took the car?
Is Gabbie with you?
No, I thought Gabbie was you! As I sent this text I started walking furiously over to our room as I walk I passed the spot our car is supposed to be. I get there and unlock the room door. Anna’s looking at me wide-eyed Ben’s fast asleep. I look at Ben sleeping peacefully and smack his blonde head. His hair’s soft but I can’t get distracted.
“Oww why’d you do that?” ben complained
“Wake up we lost Gabbie”
“Lost Gabbie?” Ben says groggily
I look over at anna when last you see her?
Night walking out I asked where she go and she said walk
My brain is about to explode, I look out the window again to confirm we’re not crazy but the car hasn’t magically appeared like my curse to change time.
“What are we gonna do now?” I ask the room. Anna looks at me confused
“Dude she can’t hear you,” Ben says with the cover over his face blocking out the sunlight
“Shut up” I turn to anna
What we do?
I don’t know
“Ben, do you understand what’s happening?”
“Uh ya she probably went to get coffee or something”
“With my car?”
“ I don’t know dude chill”
“Fine I’ll just ‘chill’ about having my car stolen and friend missing” I jumped on the bed and put my face to the pillow maybe if I just suffocate… I turned on my back.
What time
9
“Okay we’ll wait until noon and then we figure something out, for now, I’ll call her. Maybe theirs been some kind of misunderstanding ” as I spoke I translated for Anna.
I got my phone out of my pockets, called Gabbie, and put the phone to my ear. Ring ring… Ring ring… your call has been forwarded to an
“Arrrrrg”
By noon Gabbie had not shown up.
“Okay, we’re going to get a rental and keep going. Were only about 3 hours from where we’re supposed to be.”
What about Gabbie
She fine she have my car and go without us
Don’t you want-
No, I didn’t have time for this,
“Get your stuff and were leaving” I ordered a rental no matter what, we’re getting to that beach.
30 minutes later we were packed in the rental heading toward the beach.
Ben was driving because he refused to let me.
2 hours into the trip and Bzz bzz my phone was vibrating against my back pocket. I removed it to study who was calling, what I saw surprised me. Gabbie’s dark face and deep curls appeared on my screen, the ID-verified it, it was, in fact, Gabbie calling. Without a second thought, I put it on silent. If she wanted to talk to us she should’ve stayed
“Who was that?” Ben inquired
“Nobody” I sat forward and stared into the open freeway. As we came past the beach houses the water looked stunning. We got to the house we’d rented and sure enough, the pink panther was sitting in the driveway. Gabbie came running out in tears.
Gabbie threw herself to my knees
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, forgive I just go so scared and I didn’t know what to do and so I took the car and-”
“It’s okay” I gave her a reassuring smile
“Really?” she sniffled and wiped at her runny nose
“Yes, now stop getting tears all over the car”
I got out, We put our arms around one another happy to be back safe from the dangers. I felt safe and happy. The warm air blew against my face, ben looked amazing as ever and the girls were beaming. It was sunset and we were all walking arm and arm,
I’m free I thought with a smile, nothing can get me now
A tight pain grabbed me, around the chest, around the heart, my breathing grew difficult and I collapsed into Ben.
“What’s wrong?” Ben cried
I tried to speak but all I could get out was a gasp.
Ben looked up “somebody call 911!”
“On it” Gabriella was already on her phone. Tears stream down Anna’s face as she looked down at me her red hair blows in the wind. Bens hand cradled my head. But I knew it was my time I knew that this was the repercussion for saving Ben, I knew it had to come to this. But he’ll be okay so will the others they’ve always been. As I feel my heartbeat begin to slow and the darkness closing in I feel at peace with the fact I had saved Ben it was worth it. With my last strength, 3 words escaped my lips.
I love you
editor: Olivia Dennis
Picture from:
HD, Yang. “27 Yin & Yang HD Wallpapers | Background Images.” Wallpaper Abyss, Wallpaper Abyss, 2020, wall.alphacoders.com/by_sub_category.php?id=210489&name=Yin+%26amp%3B+Yang+Wallpapers. Accessed 18 Sept. 2020.
